Lessons from Karuna Cayton's Misleading Mind

Last October 2013, I encountered a situation that left me embittered. Fortunately, I downloaded several ebooks and discovered "The Misleading Mind: How we Create Our Own Problems and How Buddhist Psychology Can Help Us Solve Them".

Image taken from: http://www.digitalaptitude.com/blog/10-books-that-changed-my-life
YES. This books is life-changing. If you allow yourself to be changed, that is.

Below is a list of points that struck a chord in me. I initially shared them with a friend, and I thought non-readers of the book would benefit it. I structured my learnings into something memorable, like having a conversation myself with the book answering my concern.

Happy reading!

Before, I was a problematic, unhappy, grudge-holding, moody little girl. But one day, i was sick of it. Then i read a book...

·  "Our 'problem', what makes desires destructive, is that we cling to or become attached to what we desire."

·  "In essence, we cause our own problems by seeking, desiring, or relying on transient, external things to make us happy"

·  "Our problems are caused by our misperception of the nature of reality and the nature of our mind"

·  "Yet the truth is, most pleasures only create the desire for more."

·  "All worldly pursuits have but one unavoidable and inevitable end, which is sorrow."

Then i realized, oh great, so what do i do?

·  "We need to develop a deep awareness of the way our problems arise, their root causes and then we need to train ourselves in how to cope with them every time they come up."

·  "If we exercise our freedom to choose how we relate with our emotions and how much we draw our identity from them, we slowly and surely become happier and healthier people."

·  "We experience increasing contentment not by doing all we can to avoid suffering, but by meeting suffering head on when it occurs and transforming it."

·  "For it is the correct perception of things as they are, of reality, that will free us from constantly being whipsawed by whatever emotion may arise within our mind."

·  "We are accountable for our mental health and emotions, even if we are not to 'blame' or accountable for our circumstances growing up."

·  "We start by accepting the counterintertuitive notion that we must use our problems to solve our problems. Problems provide the resistance that helps us exercise our minds."

·  "In mind training, the intentions and motivations of others, although relevant, are not the primary focus. we are are concerned with our point of view and its accompanying response."

·  "Learn to put the blame where it belongs: on our misperception of things and of our self and on the habitual compulsive reactions those misperceptions lead us to take"

·  The first goal is to understand and see the disturbing emotions as something external to your identity or sense of self."

·  "The mind-training practitioner thinks, 'my old habits want to trap me and send me down a road that I will later regret. Instead, I'll use this situation as an opportunity to further develop my mind."

·  "Because we know that the only way we can achieve the balanced state of mind of an awakened person is by confronting head on the habitual patterns that have imprisoned us for our entire life."

·  "There are 3 general categories of interventions that deal with the upsetting emotions: blocking negative impulses, observing and releasing the emotions, and transforming negative thoughts into their positive opposites.

and then i realized that....

·  "Reality is what we label it.

·  "And like that, nothing exists until we perceive, label, and interpret it."

·  "We do not live in bare experience. We live in a world of interpretation, assumption, and projection. we wear tinted glasses."

·  "Self-pity is a totally nonproductive state of mind and thoroughly self-indulgent; nobody likes hanging around a self-pitying person, including ourselves. The more we indulge in self-pity, the more unhappy we become."

·  "We do have problems, but this does not mean we are problems. We believe our problem and our self are the same. This is looking at problems in the wrong way, in a damaging way."

·  "The essence of thought transformations is that problems are actually helpful to us."

·  "All of the troubles we confront throughout our life are viewed as teachings"

·  "If we drop our attachments to what we desire, we will not be overwhelmed by disturbing emotions and can see the benefit in any apparent upset or problems."

Oh, there's hope for me!

·  "Another quality of the mind is that is is utterly fluid."

·  "What you do in life physically changes what your brain looks like. You can wire and rewire yourself with the simple choice of which musical instrument---or professional sport, you play."